After our exam week away in a house in Macedon, after Indi's 18th birthday, after cocktails and dinners and dancing in the city to celebrate her, after Camberwell market, and after finally picking up our Jazzy from the airport, we came home.
As someone who lives her life in bite-sized manageable portions, for weeks it had felt like the night of Sunday the 18th was when one portion stopped and Monday the 19th was a new beginning.
I dreamed that I would wake up on the Monday morning with the happy, comforting thought that all of my people were under our roof, snuggled up in their warm beds. And then I would go out and get stuck straight into my garden. I hoped to spend the next few days planting out every single pot in the greenhouse. I couldn't wait to begin.
I got dressed in my overalls and work boots, I popped a podcast in my ears and off I went.
But when I got there what I found wasn't exactly what I had expected.
What I found was a jungle. Weeds so thick I could hardly see the plants, grass so high I was scared I would step on a snake walking down the rows. There was no way I would be planting anything in that garden that day. I didn't know where to start, I couldn't work out what to do, I stood there feeling upset and out of control for a very long time.
After a while the words in my headphones started filtering into my brain and my consciousness. Coincidentally I was listening to a podcast that was talking about how feelings of anxiousness and panic can be compared to a working dog with no sheep. All that energy and enthusiasm and focus and drive, with no place to go.
I was the dog, I needed to move my sheep/seedlings into their new paddock/garden, I needed to get practical, I needed an outlet, I needed a job.
So I mowed all the paths and I weeded some of the beds and when my farmer boy came over we pulled out some old crops, planted some more and then mulched them. After a while I began to see that things were looking more manageable, I felt less overwhelmed and I started to calm down. That evening I worked until it got too dark to see.
On Tuesday it poured with rain and the temperatures plummeted. I couldn't risk exposing my seedling babies to the elements, nor did it look like I should as the forecast for the rest of the week only looked colder and wetter and windier.
So the week that was supposed to be all about planting and staking and irrigating, instead ended up being spent mostly indoors...
spending time with our traveler. Looking at her pictures, listening to her stories, asking her questions, cuddling her, admiring her and feeling so grateful for the adventures she had and to have her back home.
Spinning fleece into wool. I'm still not great at it but I'm completely obsessed. I wrote once about how I was scared to start spinning my own yarn because it would take time away from the all important knitting. Well I'm here to report that it has. Absolutely! Apart from Indi's birthday crown, I've hardly knitted a stitch in weeks. And I'm okay with that. Happy even. It feels like it's adding to my knitting process rather than subtracting from it. I can't imagine how extra special it'll feel once I start creating something from what I've spun. I guess it's making a slow craft even slower but also so much richer. Lucky I'm not in a hurry.
I've been reading my sister Abby's copy of The Nowhere Child which is fast paced and suspenseful and completely unputdownable.
We finally divided our dahlia tubers. I would have loved to have planted them already but with all this rain it felt like too great a risk. Hopefully tomorrow.
I watched our poppies about to pop and begged them to wait until after the rains and it looked like they might have listened.
And I've LOVED spending time as a family of five again, listening to Jazzy write a song on the guitar about her trip, watching Indi rediscovering life away from the pressures of school, walking through the garden collecting treasures with Pepper, admiring Bren's ongoing shed renovations, spending time in my studio, watching my girls comforting and cuddling and encouraging each other, and trying to remember that all this rain is such a blessing just before summer.
And sitting here right now writing this I can see that although this week didn't turn out how it was meant to, case in point being the still full to bursting greenhouse, it did turn out pretty wonderfully. Except for the cold, I haven't liked one single second of that.
Enough about me, how about you?
How has your week been?
Has it gone to plan? Or veered off wildly?
Can you relate to that sheep dog without any sheep feeling?
What flowers have you been picking from your garden?
What podcasts have you been loving?
I have to go now, Indi, Jazzy and Bren have come into my studio. Indi is trying on outfits for her graduation tonight and I need to focus.
Have a beautiful weekend my friends.
So much love to ya!
Kate x
I planted out the last seedlings and they are sitting in the ground looking cold. Harvested the garlic, the heads are much smaller this year (a friend said the same thing). The roses have been beautiful. I have become obsessed with double knitting. It is a dangerous rabbit hole to go down
ReplyDeleteYour blog is an inspiration for me.
ReplyDeleteSorry for my English.
Always get a happy surprise when your blog link comes on Friday Facebook ❤️
ReplyDeleteIt has been too wildly windy to do much in the garden except water some newly planted seedlings given by a neighbour, Gaura (perennial Butterfly bush), also water wise. I love freebie volunteer plants.
Happy spinning! And you never know where it will take you...it led me to weaving and now I'm completely hooked. I love your blog and every Friday look forward to seeing what's been going on in your world. Your pics and words always give me a lift, and remind me I'm not alone sorting out this complicated, joyful, messy life!
ReplyDeleteHi Kate,
ReplyDeleteAlways a pleasure to read your weekly update. I have started my last month of my lap of Oz. I have been totally disorganised and taking each day as it comes. When I crossed over from SA to Vic, I decided to book my Tassie boat transfer. Which meant that I had to wait a week because it is heavily booked. So I drove half way down the great ocean road, headed north and stayed at Ballarat, drove through Daylesford (virtual wave) and up to Bendigo. Then down the Yarra Valley to Toora, so I could visit Wilson’s Prom and now have one more night before I hop on the ferry to Tassie. A quick trip, I know and I hope to bring the kids back, sometime soon.
I have loved my Oz trip and have noticed my anxiety is starting to show up daily, because I feeling a little lost (if I am honest). I miss my children and long to spend time with them, which is in contrast to loving the freedom of travel and no routine. I become completely immersed in the moment and flip to worrying about what happens once I get back to Brisbane.
Three weeks and the final chapter of my #whydiss around Oz adventures is written. As summer begins and the year ends, i will have to face and embrace a new beginning in the new year, what ever that maybe.
Wishing you love and light
Rochelle
Your panic of which way to go, reminds me of a time I helped a friend 'tidy' her very large attic room. She was in transition of moving out and moving on with her life, so it added unneeded stress. Her hands fluttered and she started to build to an all out panic attack because we could barely get the door open, as her -partner- had just tossed things into the room with gushes of anger.
ReplyDeleteWe pushed our way in and I said breathe deeeepllly and to start we will just clear the door area, then we will make four piles. His/Yours/donations/tip. It took us hours and a few upsets as she stressed about what should go where. But we got it done and she has happily moved to a home of her own, where everything remains in its place and how she wants it. She smiles all the time, when I tell her how peaceful her own home is and how lovely it is to share a tea/knit with her...then we harken back to that day and giggle and smile.
All things turn out for the best in the end as my Granny always told me.
Thanks for sharing your stories. They are such a joy to read!
I am a depressed sheep dog always wanting to get on with things and do projects or get into something practical but always the panic and the lack of focus. Starting in on one thing and just focusing is so hard for me so I end up literally chasing my tail in this scenario - so glad you were able to focus and do.
ReplyDeleteIt's such a joy to see your photographs and learn about all the wonderful things you are growing and planting now. Here it is dark and damp and cold and dreary as heck. I am not a fan. Thank you for sharing your week.
I'm reading 'A Man Called Ove' - highly recommend it :)
Hi,
ReplyDeleteThanks for share. Good blog.
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I can understand your initial trepidation about spinning taking all your time and energy away from knitting but am glad you are loving it.
ReplyDeleteDon't think of it as an expense to your knitting. (This is where I get a bit philosophical - bear with me!)
Think of the four seasons (I often praise living in southern Australia where we get to experience four distinct seasons). As a restless person, I love that: just as I'm getting exhausted by the summer heat, or bored with cold dark days, there's always a change coming and the next season is met with relief, excitement and possibilities.
Think of the spinning stage as one of the four seasons of a project so by the time you come to knit with your newly spun yarn, you will have a renewed enthusiasm and perhaps even see knitting through different eyes.
we are deep in the heart of winter here so I always look
ReplyDeleteforward to your blog as a beautiful reprieve from the snow & ice
that is outside my window.
xo