from last weekend's glamping trip to the beach
from that rare second when i looked up and saw beauty rather than work to-do
from a family potato digging day
from a beautiful parcel of yarn sent to me by jackie @intambo_yarn
The sheep got out in a storm and we've spent the best part of two days trying to get them back. One of the girls' close friends has had a terrifying health scare. Another one of our girls is having an awful time with some school yard stuff. We've had a minor health scare of our own. We haven't slept through the night in weeks. We're at that stage where we should be starting to wind down for the winter but our to-do list feels HUGE and OVERWHELMING. The days are starting to close in on us as they become shorter and icier and darker. And the thought of our precious girls being driven to and from school through the dark windy forest in the wet and the gloom doesn't make me feel good at all.
Me and my farmer boy talk A LOT and OFTEN about details and plans and the best way to tackle situations so none of the above list was a surprise to him, but still he stopped me at this stage and told me that he thinks what's going on is life's way of reminding us to enjoy the good stuff. To not be complacent and live without thought, but to live with choices and meaning.
He's right you know. I know.
We need the occasional crappy times so we can really fly high when things get good again.
So instead of adding to my list I stopped and I reversed it. I took a big deliberate breath into my stomach and I closed my eyes. I felt the warm almost winter sun on my face. And as I opened my eyes I saw the last of the liquid amber tree's leaves flutter softly to the ground. And then I noticed the bulbous Brussel sprouts and started dreaming up ways to cook them for dinner. It was just a moment but it felt like an important one.
The sheep are still out, I'm still stressing about the girls but we'll deal with it all. That's what we do.
And just before I go there's this photo. Kim Daly took it for Alphabet Journal a few years ago and I think it may be the only photo I have of me knitting. And I love it. But the reason I've put it here is because Karen Templer of Fringe Association, one of my all time knitting gurus and sources of inspiration, wrote a blog about me and called me her 'maker crush'!! Me! I actually cannot believe it. I have to put it in my blog so I can find it in the future when I question my knitting abilities.
In return I can only dream of and drool over Karen's incredible projects, her vision and her community. Karen has created something truly wonderful and I urge you wool lovers and lovers of beautiful things to check out her spaces - BLOG - INSTA.
And while we're out covering our wood piles before the rain and you are out picking your kids up from school, sitting at your desk at work, pushing a little person on the swing or just waking up - please, please cross your fingers that our sheep do what Little Bo Beep's did.
Love ya's!
xoxo
It's in the stars, I've decided. It's a lot the same here too. I started saying 'a bit', but it really is, 'a lot'. Hope those sheep do find their way home.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing worse than school yard issues. I hope they resolve for you. And I hope your lambs come home too.
ReplyDeleteLove ya's right back Kate...crikey life gets so overwhelming doesn't it? It just does. At the end of the day you and I both have a lot of beauty and goodness around us, when we finally decide to look up! Good luck with the sheep x
ReplyDeletesheep, they are sent to try us, and they do. hope they all come home safely.
ReplyDeleteHey Kate, I really do wish and hope that your sheep come home very very soon and I also hope that all those things that are making you feel overwhelmed are sorted soon. I think I could say so much more and I expect there are many of us that read your wonderful blog that would like nothing more than a good old natter with you around your campfire, but I will cut it short (?!) and just say that you give so much warmth with your writing and beautiful pics, so I am sending so much warmth back in your direction to you and your family,
ReplyDeleteBig love, Lucy xx
Hi,Kate.I love reading your blog.I hope your sheep and your energy return soon.You have a lovely family and lot of things around to feel lucky(which doesn't mean sometimes we don't).
ReplyDeleteTake care
Rosa
Hi,Kate.I love reading your blog.I hope your sheep and your energy return soon.You have a lovely family and lot of things around to feel lucky(which doesn't mean sometimes we don't).
ReplyDeleteTake care
Rosa
Hope your sheep realise life is better at home and return quickly. Your Farmer Boy is very wise and his words have great resonance for me and probably many others. It can be hard to remember the positive when life gets difficult. May you all find calmer water soon Kate. Love all your photos but particularly the one of the girls, they look so connected and comfortable together.
ReplyDeleteIt's awful when your worries disturb your sleep. You're right about focussing on the beauty and the poisitives. Hope those sheep come home dragging their sorry tails behind them soon x
ReplyDeleteI hear you. I feel the enormity of moving house, renovating work, getting our current home on the market, all on top of life and work! I just try to remember that each step counts and even small, shuffles are moving in the right direction. As always, thanks for sharing. We will get there. Hope your sheep is home safe and sound.
ReplyDeleteI think that if you can talk a lot and often, then you will always find a way out. bx xxx
ReplyDeleteThinking of you,
ReplyDeleteYour blog brings so much light and moments of happiness to me, I hope that you are able to find similar moments as you pass through this hard time.
cheers Kate
I can completely relate to how you're feeling Kate, it feels like negativity and the not so good is surrounding us at the moment. We have decided to try our hardest (it isn't easy) to put all of our energy and focus into the things we can control, as for everything else, what will be will be. We can't let it control or consume us anymore because it sure does take its toll. Your farmer boy is a wise man, hey. Much love to you all, and an extra hug to your girl having trouble in the school yard x
ReplyDeleteKeeping my fingers crossed XX
ReplyDeleteAm feeling you. It's the same up here at our place. Perhaps it's the thought of winter closing in. But we've got a gorgeous day here right now, just to remind us that the sun does shine... I'm off to bring more wood closer to the house for tomorrow and then, let-it-rain, let-it-rain, let-it-rain. Emma
ReplyDeleteHi Kate,
ReplyDeleteI just had a chance to sit down with a coffee and catch up on some blog reading. I'm very sorry about the loss of your grandfather.
I'm glad you've caught the sewing bug again, it is good for your soul.
I'm on my third and now fourth pair of socks (a lacey one that requires concentration and a plain for some mindless knitting) and it seems I've opened up another pandora station box of crafty addiction. Oh well....
Take care of you Kate.
Abbe x
Am sending huge big "go home" messages to those sheep!!! We're just here in SA praying for rain... our farmers are desperate.... Keep smilin' hun. xxx
ReplyDeleteOur backyard slopes down to the most amazing view of big ancient gums across the river to the east, and thick bush stretching off into the background, and wild paddocks to the north where roos and wallabies bound through and stop for lunch under the big trees that are home to kookaburras, cockies, parrots, maggies and heaps of other amazing birds. Our vegie beds and fruit trees are in the backyard, so when I'm out there squatting down sifting through soil, or digging up a patch for a new crop, I often remind myself to look up, stretch my back, and really stop to take in the view - it's the reason why we live here. If I didn't do that on a regular basis, all the hard work would mean a lot less. Your photo is just like those moments, Kate. Beautiful xx
ReplyDeleteYou are so totally crush-worthy! And it sounds like Karen's virtual high-five for your awesomeness came just at the right time. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteHi,Kate, I am glad you took a deep breath and looked up-- what a lovely sight indeed. The wool is gorgeous and I trust Bo-Peep's sheep have returned already! School yard things work out, often in the most unexpected ways but I agree are ABSOLUTELY horrible, so I'm not much of a comforter-- more like Job's friends so I will shut up on that! I enjoy your writing: you write well and very evocatively: I was in Oxford UK when you wrote about your Zaida and glasses--: I felt very sad for you. I was travelling with my elderly cousin-in-law and we had just done a Jewish walking tour of the East end of London from where her grandmother and Father had come-- your family backgrounds are very different (apart from being Jewish) but there was resonance in the yearning for families and the holes left by their deaths-- I miss my darling husband and his Mum very deeply and the fact that my dad is dying of Alzheimer's brought it all rather close to home.
ReplyDeleteI have returned to Melbourne and rather impulsively ran out and bought some wool, bright red, for a cardigan which I have now started. It is gorgeous and cheers up the day which here is dreary and wet-- I can hear the swishing on the streets below my city apartment. I look out the window and can see the Kings Domain Gardens and Government House across the bluestone buildings of Victoria Barracks. The remaining golden leaves on the trees are wet but lovely in the drizzle. My little girl (well, now a newly married woman) object of great persecution at school, is coming over (joy) -- life goes on, sometimes better than others but then I think of something you wrote a few months ago about your grandfather saying a prayer before eating something from the new season (along those lines) and I am grateful for what is in the moment NOW. I am glad you looked up and saw that leaf falling. Thank you for sharing. Ruth
You wrote of 'that moment' where you were able to stop 'in that moment' and begin to turn things around in your heart by reversing your list. Sure, it won't make the hard stuff go away straightaway - nothing worthwhile in this life comes easily - but it is important to do what you did. STOP. If you can, calm the inner panic of what seem to be escalating lists of stuff and clear your head. Take a MOMENT. It's the stillness of these moments, when some of our best solutions become known to us. When the mind can wander without the shackles of daily demands, even for just a moment, it can be enough to restore energy, resolve and help us see a clearer way through a difficult path ahead, even if we can only see one day ahead (or even an hour! It's okay to work it hour by hour when times are tough). Good luck with your sheep, your girls and your knitting. Invest in the moments. Take care xx
ReplyDeleteWishing very hard that the sheep are safe and home very soon! How lovely to inspire other artist! I too seem to dwell too much on the bad and have to constantly re-think things in a more positive light. When things are bad (like now, a nasty spill down some stairs and I've been laid up nearly two weeks, in peak gardening season. Also dealing with the chaos of a black bear getting into our animal feed and bee hives and the poor hubby has to deal with it alone.) So I always tell myself this when things are bad: Someone out there has it worse and still carries on and so can I. Sending good vides your way that all will workout fine.x
ReplyDeleteSuch beautiful, heartfelt words Kate. I love that although things are troubling you at the moment you have the strength to look for the beauty in your everyday.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your sheep. x
Life can be full of the bad stuff but that only makes the great happy, slow and content moments even more special and worth remembering. I had a health scare in my family as well but one night of crying and worrying was all balanced by the revelation that all is ok and I think it even brought us closer together, even though we are all scattered hundreds of miles apart. I hope it will be so for you. As for lists - I reversed it, too! Instead of 2to do" list I write a "done" list. I knw what I have to do but doing it and THEN adding it to the list makes the sense of accomplishment even greater. :) Good luck to you all!
ReplyDeleteGorgeous photos. I love it.
ReplyDelete