Sunday, April 11, 2010

Grumpy bum.

I'm grumpy!!

You'd better not ask me a question or I might snap at you.

We've just come back home after a huge weekend in Melbourne and I feel like I can't deal with my real life anymore today.

Deliveries to the airport and restaurants on Friday night til late, early morning wake up and a farmers' market on Saturday, two hours off and then back into the city again for Bren's talk at the Home Ideas show, late to bed and early to rise this morning and the drive home to then be on call at the farm stall all day.

It feels like there's no space in my head or my life. Someone is always crying or fighting or demanding or needing or interrupting me.

A while back I was sitting with my girls and Bren at a cafe when a bunch of girls came in. They were in their late teens or early twenties and gorgeous. They came in wearing big sunglasses and tight jeans and placed their bags that matched their shoes on the table. They were chatting excitedly and I couldn't help but stare at them as they looked like they were from a different planet to me. Me, who sat at the colouring in book and babccino table.

Bren noticed me staring and asked if I wanted to be one of them.

I contemplated it for a bit and then said no. Although they looked like they were all glamorous and like they were having such fun, in a way I am who they want to be when they grow up. Well not me exactly but what I represent.

I have the wonderful husband, the three lovely (well maybe not today) girls, the mortgage, the business... I have my happily ever after.

So, although today I'd give everything to sit at their table and not have to wipe bums and noses and worry about lice and dinner and school winter uniforms, those girls are probably hoping to have all this when they grow up.

So it is this thought and this lovely Holly Hobbie picture that I found in an op shop a few weeks ago, that are making me feel a bit better about my life today.

For some reason Holly Hobbie makes me happy, a sort of youthful, simple happy. And this gorgeous, framed picture that someone has spent hours and hours stitching, is following me around the house before she finds a wall to be hung on. This picture was one of those finds that made my heart skip a beat when I came across it.

The stitched Holly Hobbie, but not the grumpiness, is my entry in this week's Flea Market Finds over at Sophie's blog.

I hope you have a great week this week, I'm off to find my happy space. XX

54 comments:

  1. Oh, come on Kate, put a smile on.
    I'm sure you felt better when you got all that off your chest anyway!
    The sun will come up tomorrow!!

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  2. I had one of those days of feeling super grumpy on Thursday when the children were fighting non-stop (even a walk with the dogs didnt stop them) so I gave up and sent them off to their nan and pops whilst I went to the gym to work out my stress levels. I felt much better but still a little bit crabby. I think we are allowed to feel like that from time to time, like we have no time to do what we like when we want to but that is being a parent isnt it. One day when they are all grown up we will probably miss the constant parenting wont we! I hope you have a much better day tomorrow Kate, and you do seem to accomplish a great deal in your life, a lot more than others!

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  3. Thinking of you Kate! Hope you can sit down to some peace and quite tonight with a glass of wine and feet up. And perhaps in a few weeks, or a few months, maybe a few years, you will laugh at it.

    But until then big hugs from me, who has been that grumpy with only one child, no business, no travel or anything. Just a dog stealing fish, a husband who is deaf in one ear, a toddler who is into everything, unreliable people, being on hold for 25 mins etc etc etc....

    And at those times I call my sister, my Mum or my best friend and whinge whinge whinge. Gosh it makes me feel better. :)

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  4. Wow! My heart would have skipped several beats upon seeing that!

    I know how you feel. I get those days, a lot(!), when I would much rather be someone else and not have to deal with the shit that can be my life, but at the end of the day, I know I wouldn't have things any different. And once you've sat back and got this all off your chest, you'll feel the same too :)

    Big hugs to you Kate,
    Selina xx

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  5. ohh Kate! I have those days too and I think about life before & life now and you know what, life now is pretty good & I have to deal with only two noses & bottoms & tantrums but I have the wonderful partner that loves us unconditionally and I look into their eyes & when I hear that I am the best mum in the whole wide world and I am loved fifty sixty times my heart just melts.
    So the gorgeous young girls with their silver sparkly shoes & perfect spray tan & manicures can have just that. I will have what you & I have ANYDAY!

    big hugs gorgeous girl

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  6. We're all entitled to have the grumps every now and then, wouldn't be human if we didn't AND we would be terribly boring if things were rosy, happy and sunny every day!! You can only appreciate the sunshine when you've had cloudy days before!! My gran used to say that to us eons ago when we had the grumps as kids, so, enjoy the grumps today 'cos tomorrow will be sunny.....
    Lizzie
    xxx

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  7. Money can't buy what you have Kate and its a whole lot more precious than any hand bag, nits and all.

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  8. I hear you! I just got back from a week's holiday on the Gold Coast (from Melbourne) with my husband and two kids (2YO and 4YO). I could have written the post myself!
    I know those kinds of days very well but you are absolutely right. It's about reflecting at the end of the day and smiling because you have a lot to be grateful for. I know you'll find the happy place soon.

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  9. I have those moments - a lot, especially around my sister in law who is so young and carefree and only has to worry about her next clothes purchase...but seriously I would not go back to being that age, I finally feel more comfortable in my own skin, that has taken a while.

    BTW I am in love with your Holly Hobby. She has a very special place in my heart, my made made me and my 2 sisters Holly Hobby dolls plus a 3 piece wardrobe as well!

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  10. I know exactly how you feel, I really do. It doesn't make it any better, but we all have days like this, as you know I've shared MANY & it is so great that we can use this little bit of cyber space to vent, share with friends & feel re-assured & human! It's true we do look at those gorgeous free youngies & 'remember when', but given the choice, I'd rather the 'now'. I hope you'll feel better soon and I hope your life calms down a little. We need to simplify things I think...easier said than done! x

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  11. I know those days- the grumpy over life days not the mum issues but my owns ones and well I think perhaps it's when a punching bag is really needed. You grump away you've got plenty of cause and just because
    And yes it does always look better on the other side, but you know that and you don't really need to be told that or how lucky you are. Everyone is entitled to grumpy times!!! xo

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  12. I so 'get' what you have stated. I know grumpy - I am grumpy. Following a frenetic Easter weekend with everyone we knew wanting to come & stay..I was not only exhausted but having to pack my stuff again for another week away ay work. I have just come home now.
    Dropped my bags, unpacked a million loads of washing, vacuumed the house, tidied and de-cluttered (off to the thrift shop tomorrow to donate).
    I am so tired my eyes hurt, I want to go to bed with a book and a cuppa. Instead I'll prep dinner & wait for my family to get home from their day out... and I whilst I wouldn't change too much about my world - every now and then time out would be ace.
    Breathe deep and go with it, tis all you can do really. Peta

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  13. oh, one of THOSE days. Good luck as you see it out. It's very interesting the 'outside looking in' and the assumptions we make, I reckon. We never know their story (like those girls could have been looking at you thinking your life must be perfect- who knows what was going on with their dynamics). I love watching teenager girls communicate excitedly, cracks me up. But that's not what I came to say, I wanted to say I had that Hollie Hobby growing up- my mum doesn't chuck anything away, wonder what happened to it!

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  14. What a day! Sending love and smiles (and maybe a pair of fabulous shoes to put on next time you feel like this) your way. I have nominated you for a Sunshine Blog Award because even though you may not feel like it today...you provide inspiration and joy with you lovely blog. Pop into my blog when the fog lifts and check it out. Hope all is well :)

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  15. I've been reading a really interesting book (Motherhood by Anne Manne) and in it, she describes the concept of 'maternal cheerfulness' - something that mothers seem to instinctively be able to find, despite all the pressures making us feel otherwise.

    Sounds to me like you - even through writing this post - are doing what you need to to pull yourself out of the grumpy bums. Even though, with that schedule, you have every right to have the shits!

    Oh, for the freedom to just luxuriate in grumpiness without having to lift ones mood for the good of everybody around us...

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  16. i'd love to be one of those girls again for a while......but only a little while, it's much more fun now:)

    chin-up sista! a sex and the city dvd is my fix for grumpiness. you wanna borrow some? trust me it feels great to belly laugh at chicks again:)

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  17. I feel for you and your horrid day. I don't know how you achieve what you do. You are definitely allowed to feel that way at times.
    I love your Holly Hobbie. She is so fresh and bright. I'm glad she was able to cheer you up a bit.

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  18. I really get annoyed when people tell me to cheer up. I find it so unhelpful.

    You are allowed to feel fed up, over it, bored, grumpy, cranky, tired, overwelmed and envious of others lives.

    You are allowed to feel however you want to, but isn't it great that something someone chucked out can make you feel so much better, what a glorious find... maybe a little reminder of your "hobbies" the things you love that are only yours that you don't have to share with anyone... and incidently I was in the middle of writing a very similar post...

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  19. Scrolling through the comments I'm sure its reassuring to know that you are in no way alone. I have two little girls and with the weather putrid today they've just bickered and screamed all day. Its tiring and makes for a really long day. In the last hour I've baked muffins for lunch boxes, prepared dinner, bathed kids and finally have had a second to scroll through the wonderful blog updates. If we could, I'm sure we'd all give you a big group hug. Hang in there. Our parents lied when they said it was easy!!!!

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  20. Oh hunny bunny! Go into their bedrooms right now and just look at them while they are sleeping. It does it for me every time.

    You also have to remember that life isn't meant to be this way. We are suppose to live with our extended family and help each other out. It's no wonder so many people can't cope these days.

    You are doing just great, you just have so much on your plate and so many other things you love to do on top of that.

    Now off you go and just look at them for a while. Hugs to you xx

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  21. I can see why she would make you feel happy - how could someone bear to part with her??
    I'm sorry you have been so busy Kate - I know what you mean about there always beinga demand - sopmetimes it's hard to find the headspace to be just you isn't it.
    And you are right - I bet those girls were thinking how lucky you are to be sitting there with a husband who you adore and three lovely girls to love.
    Hope tomorrow is a better day. :-)

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  22. I do hope you are feeling a bit better Kate, I think we all feel this as mothers (maybe father's too but not to the same extent I don't think anyway.) I know this grumpiness very well and it suffocates me when I don't get my own time, time to create or to just think, but I need even just a short time to regroup. I always have and do love solitude and sometimes that doesn't mix with having a family!!! I hope you find time to create this week to restore your spirits. I feel like this at my worst when it has been/is school holidays.

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  23. I'm sure you felt much better after writing that post. It sounds like you figured it all out typing with your fingers. Please email me your postal address, as if you like Holly Hobbie I have a teeny tiny little gift to send you! xo m.

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  24. You need to start worrying when you have more of those days than not.
    Otherwise, seems like you're muddling along like the rest of us.
    At least we all have each other to whinge to and get lots of nice supportive comments to make us feel OK again.
    x

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  25. Oh lovely. I wish I could make you a cup of tea and offer to run you a nice hot bath (god, wouldn't we all just like that?). I hope you have a peaceful night tonight and a great night's sleep.

    Holly rocks. This has sent me waaaay back to my own childhood. I had a sort of plastic-y story board book thingy that featured her (you know like fuzzy felt only thin plastic stuff?). God I loved it.

    xx

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  26. I had the Holly Hobbie doona cover - it was so beautiful!
    It sounds like everyone's a bit grumpy at the moment. This afternoon I nearly had an accident on the stupid Flemington Rd roundabout while returning the hire car, only 500m from the Hertz office! But, at least they didn't notice the tiny dint in the rear door that we got while at the Dubbo zoo. Two lucky things, I should be pleased - but just dreading going back to work tomorrow :-(
    Hope you have a lovely week. Btw, the Two of Us yesterday was good reading!

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  27. I dont like those perfectly poised but underneath the fake surface unhappy too much time on their hands no lasting or meaningful relationships to speak of go to bed at night vapidly dreaming of how to do their hair the next day and what colour they will paint their perfectly non-cuticled nails kind of girls either!
    They make me want to sew even faster!
    Did you find your happy space?

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  28. Blah! There must be something in the air, change of seasons perhaps. Totally get it! Let your grumpy have a turn I say. Use your grumpy to help you find time for you in the busy crazy thing that is life.

    I had that longing "I want what they seem to have and not this crazy stupid crappy busy life I have" look when I was in Vic with the family. My brother, 20, is currently overseas, at the same age I was knocked up with no. 1. Sis that just got married, at the same age I was a mother of 2 and sis no. 2 with their flashy new car, at her age I had just found out I was having baby no. 4.....so I get it!

    And in the morning, after a strong coffee, I wouldn't change one thing! :) Take care of YOU and let grumpy have a turn ;) xox

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  29. I get that feeling when I come across Holly Hobbie. It takes me back more than other toys or things I had as a child. If so many of us had the stuff as children where is it all now? I haven't come across any in op shops.

    I am one of the people who looks at those of you with a family and children with envy. I haven't been so lucky. I do admire you as I know from friends what a struggle it can be on some days. Unfortunately I am no gorgeous teenager though :-)

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  30. I'm with you Kate....only two more days of school holidays to go :-) Hubby works from before daylight to after dark and only has Sunday off (our own business as contractors for fertilizer spreading) so I get the grumpys a bit as it is draining all the demanding, whining and fighting. Still today I had a lovely horse ride while Billy took the boys to the dump and tomorrow I am taking the boys to Cairns to the movies and then to stay overnight at the hotel with the lovely pool...they are so excited it just has to make you smile. Things always look better after a good nights xx

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  31. I think we all have those days where we would love to just step into someone elses shoes for a while... but then we remember all the wondeful things in our lives that we wouldn't change for the world.
    I hope you can get a good nights sleep tonight. You definitely deserve it!

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  32. Holly Hobbie always fills my heart with happy things :)

    Winter school uniforms. SH##. 11.00pm. Any shops open now on a Sunday night for black tights? Bugger.

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  33. It's in the air - I reckon. But what cheered me up no end this evening (because I was too grumpy to cook a dinner dinner, so we ate a breakfast dinner) was SCRUMMY OMELETTY DELICIOUSNESS. Thank you again to you and your talented chooks. Filled up with comfort food and snuggling a hot water bottle, and tomorrow is a whole 'nother day.

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  34. thank you for sharing! I know the feeling. I always struggle with my mood when I've not gotten enough sleep. Especially on busy weekends. I understand the longing for something different & maybe longing is not the right word...
    As wonderful as it is to have all these people we love so much in our lives, there are always times when it feels very overwhelming to make sure that they are all happy & cared for & there is just not any energy left for us. Sometimes it does take energy to feel happy. Sounds like you need a bit of time to yourself. It'll all fall back into place & you'll find balance. It's just that warding off the grumpies until then is not easy. Good luck!

    thanks so much for posting. you don't know how excited i get when your blog comes up in my reader! :)

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  35. ((hugs))

    The good thing about being "past" that stage although envious of it at times. Is that we are wise enough to know the grass isn't necessarily greener over there.

    Although of course I am guilty of it too. Especially the days where hubby sleeps til 2 and I am up at 7busting my but on a weekend just like every other day and he actually gets time off...

    Hope those kiddos straighten up soon so you can get a little peace of mind. That's life for ya!

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  36. I can recognize myself in your feelings. I also have days like that, there is always someone who wants yout attention and pull you in all directions.
    Its funny that i also get happy when i see Holly Hobby, it reminds me of my childhood. Have a nice week !!
    Cecilie

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  37. I'm having one of those patches. Feeling like I just need to close the door and hide so I can find a bit of time to myself and try to sort through the mounds of things that are on top of me. Glad Holly helped you and hope you've found your happy space. Lisa x

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  38. i think one of the hardest things about these 'cranky' days is the guilt you feel about feeling that way. i think we all have days where we just want to change lives for a moment - to have no responsibilities, no noise and an opportunity to slow down. but i think we all know that we would never, ever want to change a thing. i love my life so much - yes, the kids drive me nuts at times, and there are days when i feel blue - but you need blue days to make the happy ones even better.
    take care - and thanks for sharing - i feel safe in the knowledge that i'm not the only one ;-)
    l
    x
    ps if you want to get happy again, go out and watch your chickens. we just got some and they are so much fun to watch!

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  39. hope your week gets better xxx

    love holly hobbie and i hope the goodies I sent you arrived safely?
    that should cheer you up!

    SJx

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  40. Thats Holly Hobbie is devine, makes me want to try and draw one up. I often look at the young girls today done up to the nine's and wonder if I would be like that if I had my time along theirs? I dont think I would its just not me. Im dealing with my first out break of lice...its the pits....
    and yes Holly has no winter uniform to speak of. Can I pinch your post for my blog? lol you sum it so well. Big Hugs to you.

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  41. Well, good on your for reframing it all and recognising the wealth of what you have (even when the green green grass of carefree youth looks appealing!).

    That Holly Hobbie is one amazing find.

    On that note I have a little something to send your way, may I have your postal address please?

    x G

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  42. Hope you're feeling better having got that off your chest. I feel the same sometimes, but will feel better now that you have given it a bit of perspective. I love Holly Hobby, I've still got some bits of my Holly Hobby sheet set from when I was little. Great find.

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  43. Gosh, I feel I'd be a bit lost at the end of all these comments Sweet Kate, so I won't write the long waffle I have in my head, but I know what you are saying - oh yes - I think so many of us do... as you can see by the forrest of comments you have amassed here...!

    That stitchery is an absoloute treasure too by the way!

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  44. Good Morning Grumpy Bum!
    Hope you feel better today.
    A good vent makes you feel better. I have been having lots of these thoughts too lately - how did I get here!Wish I could step back into my old life for a while. We seem to lose our identity as mums and don't feel appreciated sometimes.
    It's nice to read your post and all the comments, so I know I am not the only one feeling this way.
    Thanks everyone
    Have a great day

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  45. good to know you're not alone, eh?

    Wishing you (and everybody else!) a happy day when it suits. For now - I'm going to embrace my grumpies and get rid of them tonight at yoga.

    xx Amy

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  46. Holly Hobbie...now that brings back memories! I'm not having a grumpy day today but I sure was yesterday!
    Jana

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  47. At least you can admit that you are feeling grumpy. Nothing worse than a grump in denial! A good nights sleep and a hug may have helped you put your life in perspective today I hope....otherwise I'm running away with you to get spray tans, skinny jeans and no responsibility!
    Oh and bring the Holly Hobbie

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  48. What a beautiful Holly Hobbie stitching - so pretty, I will have to go dig mine out from where ever its gone to hide and its nowhere as lovely as yours

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  49. You wont be seeing me sit at a table with matching shoes and handbags anytime soon. I had best sit with you, with my free radical kids, a hubby thats the best, shabby hair, no make up, un Ironed clothes and an urgent need to eat CAKE!! I think you'd make fine company actually xx

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  50. Live your 'Happily ever after'. It is yours to make of it what you will. It may have it's grumpy days but they just let you appreciate the good days.
    ((Hugs))

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  51. the grumpy days get sent to make you appreciate the good days even more. rock on holly hobby

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  52. Ahhh... we all get grumpy. As a child I had a Holly Hobby poster on my wall that had the words forming an arch above her bonnet "A friend who cares is a friend who shares"... but regretfully I have no wisdom to share with you about grumpiness other than to say "I hear you" and "I get grumpy too". Never would have thought about Holly Hobby as a means of lifting my spirits - so thanks for sharing that.
    I find that I am most often grumpy when there seems to be little space and everything is racing too fast for me to catch my breath. That sense of losing control is overwhelming and the result is a grumpy me.
    Hope you find some space and can slow things down a bit. Perhaps this is a time to review your "lists" and do some slashing... and most importantly move taking care of yourself up to the top.

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  53. Aww, I've been there too...staring at 'those girls'. Ah, the joys of getting older and being a busy mum - on one side: there is a lovely contentment about it, on the other: it can drive you bonkers.

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  54. Just found your blog with its wonderful words, photos and sewing!
    I see you like vintage sheets and have to agree they are so hard to find. I did find a Holly Hobbie pillow case, she's not my thing if you send me your address I will pass her onto you.

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Thanks so much for stopping by...

I do read every single comment you leave and appreciate it very much, but I should let you know that I can be a wee bit on the useless side when replying to comments, that's just me, everyday life sometimes gets in the way....so I'll apologise now, just in case.

Kate XX

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